In Which Tabris Realizes She Hates Politics
by Adarian
Summary: Forced once again to hear that praises of Loghain among the royals, Tabris announces to her constituents exactly how much of a jerk he is, with him chiming along. Written for a kink-meme request.


Tabris was not having the best of days. Dragged in for the Oaths of Fealty, she merely stood politely as nobles declared, rather unconvincingly, their undying loyalty to her. Her mind was on a hundred things at once, none of which involved making small talk with those who obviously hated her.

Overhearing much of their talk as she passed through, she ignored some of the more immediately racist things spoken against her. What was a ceremony without some drunk noble calling her a knife-ear and suggesting lewd acts with her? It was practically traditional at this point. She even could stand suggestions that the elves sold from Ferelden were simply causalities of war. She could even handle the political "debates" that argued that the Grey Wardens had slain Cailian themselves in order to put Alistair on the throne.

However, there was one thing she could not stand.

"I'm sorry," she smiled darkly, putting her hand on a dismayed Bann Esmerelle's shoulder, "But did you just suggest that Loghain did nothing wrong during the war? Are you so far in denial against me that you just stated that Loghain was the real hero of Ferelden? Enlighten me. What do you think he did to stop the darkspawn? What do you think he did to bring us all together today, hmm?"

"The Hero of River Dane," Esmerelle said proudly, "Is a war hero. He cast out the Orleasians. He got rid of filthy knife-ears like you. You are not worthy to hold this seat, not the one good Rendon Howe held for so long. If I must swear fealty to a Grey Warden, it seems fitting it should be him and not you."

"Hold on one second," Tabris sneered, walking across the hall. The other nobles stared at the outburst, and watched with morbid amusement as the small elven woman dragged a confused Loghain by the ear into the centre of the room.

"This man," Tabris indicated, letting go of his ear, "Is a war criminal. He abandoned his king to the battlefield. He left his son-in-law to die. He then spent weeks trying to kill me and his current son-in-law."

Loghain nodded along, shrugging slightly.

"He had noble men and women tortured and killed for opposing him."

Loghain agreed, "Arlessa Tabris is much more patient with dissent than I."

"He poisoned Arl Eamon and attempted a coop on his lands."

"You've met the Arl, didn't you want to poison him?" He joked.

Tabris glared at him and he coughed awkwardly, "Please continue."

"And he had my people, good honest citizens of Ferelden, sold into slavery to pay for his war. He signed their death warrants himself!"

"Actually, Howe did that one, I only found out about that just before the Landsmeet...but...you're right. Not important. I am a bastard. An awful, awful man who did terrible, terrible things."

"Correct," Tabris concluded, "And I would like all my lovely subjects to remember one thing. I saved this country. I killed the Archdemon myself. I brought a new King on the throne. I brought peace to this land. And your hero? This bastard of a man? He works for me. He is my subject, my soldier. I am the victor, he is the spoils. And he will report any treasonous activity to me. Do I make myself clear?"

There was a quiet agreement among the crowd and Varel stepped forth.

"I think the time for ceremonies is over, Commander," he said politely, "Shall I clear the hall?"

"Do it," Tabris grumbled, marching away, "I've had enough of these assholes."

Tabris stormed into the training room, pushing over a wooden dummy. She was in the process of kicking it repeatedly when she heard Loghain's chuckle across the room. She turned, seeing him lean against the doorframe as he watched in amusement.

"Have you decided you hate me again? This whole friendship thing getting too stale?"

"You are a bastard, you know that right? Oh, I'm Loghain, I'm so suave I make jokes when my Commander berates me in front of my former social peers. Elf slavery is so funny."

Loghain frowned slightly and said quietly, "I know. I know I am not a good man. And...this may sound odd to say, but I'm glad you know that and still accept me. Those people out there are delusional. You are far better for this country than I ever have been. You may not win them over, but you've won me."

Tabris' face softened, "Thank you."

Loghain smiled as he turned to leave, "Don't thank me yet. Wait until you have your first day in court."

Tabris groaned and went back to kicking the dummy.


End file.
